Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
MIDGETS
????
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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