I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Randomize
