I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
