I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
