he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
no you cant smoke seaweed
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I would fuck him just for his dog
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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