All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
So much Jack, so little girl.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
