Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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