just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Randomize
