U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
