going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize