We won't sleep together?
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
