what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Randomize
