so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
