States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
