big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize