Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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