remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
operation harelip BJ is a go
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Randomize
