so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
soo... how was my night?
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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