Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Randomize
