Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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