i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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