Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
