hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
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