Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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