sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Mom said you looked used
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Randomize
