should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Randomize