I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
