I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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