She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Boobs speak an international language.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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