I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Randomize
