are you still at the devil's house?
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
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