Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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