16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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