yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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