She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
