Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
either way he was missing a nipple.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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