Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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