Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
