your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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