how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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