The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
