You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
