Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
