Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
A bitchslap is in order.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
