how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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