you have to choose: penises or morals?
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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