I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
So many bounce houses so little time
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
