I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Randomize
