Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
