I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Randomize
