how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
She told me I should be a condom model.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize